Love One Another - Part V

"I love you"  We hear these words fairly often, either directly or indirectly. Our spouses, children, friends, acquaintances and even strangers will express their love for us and each other by words or by loving actions. We overhear the communication of love within our communities, hear it in song or see it expressed in movies or television. Consequently, we return an expression of love by affirming love for others in our lives. In it's purest form, love is reciprocal; an action that demands reaction and vice-versa.

But how do we react when the reciprocal nature of love is absent? How do we love and express love to those in our lives that are not easy to love? How do we love when love is not returned to us or even acknowledged by the other person?

The familiar words of John 13:34 call to us from the lips of Christ, “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another." He makes no promise that love will be returned to us, or even that it will be received as a welcome sentiment. There is no expectation or guarantee that we will see the benefits of love, or that a tangible manifestation will be created for the common good of society. Quite simply,we are called to love. But there's a subtle catch that may or not have been intentional.

When the command to "love one another" reaches the ears of those who hear, we cannot ignore the "one another" present within the command. If you and I are sitting in a room together and hear the words, "love one another", can we ignore the fact that if we are loved, we must express love in return? Christ doesn't simply compel us to "love others". We are called to "love one another". If heard in isolation, the command would make no sense, but it is meant to be heard, responded to and acted upon based on community. The assumption is that there will always be an "another" in any situation in which love is expressed.  So, while we may never be promised that love will be returned to us, we can rest in the essential co-existing nature of love. As with the air that we breath, love is sent forth and love is brought back within.

In our continuing discussion of what it means to "love one another", I asked the following friends to contribute a few sentences on what the concept means to them. Can you spot the common theme?   
    

"For me, "love one another" is action, not just feelings. In fact, it's action in spite of feelings. And for me, the action boils down to just being kind."

- David Hayward 

 David Hayward has a Masters in Theological Studies as well as in Ministry and Religion and has served local churches for over 30 years. He left the professional ministry in 2010 and launched an online spiritual community called The Lasting Supper. He is best known as the nakedpastor, a graffiti artist on the walls of religion.

 “Loving one another is being kind, caring, committed and compassionate towards others...loving other people as Christ loves us. It's not an easy task and it goes against human nature, but it is God's loving nature to love us in spite of all our faults...to look past all the sins and all the warts and see and love the beautiful person God has created. I think it is also about forgiving...simply striving to be Christ-like in an ungodly world....” 

- Jerri Brezik

Jerri is a leader at Hope Church in Houston, Texas, currently serving as a prayer ministry leader and leading prayer servant training. She is also actively involved with praise team and choir. She was baptized in the Baptist Church and grew up in the Christian Church. Jerri is a Retired NASA contractor manager and has been married to her husband Jim for 26 years. Between them both they have three children and four grandchildren. 

“To love one another is to help all people become most fully themselves. This goes beyond the golden rule of doing to others as we would like done to ourselves, but means understanding others so well that we treat them as they desire to be treated. While this often involves helping remove roadblocks and injustices that stand in others' way, it starts with seeing and accepting others as themselves and not through the lens of who we would like them to be.” 

- Julie Goss Clawson

Julie is an author, speaker, and mother who lives in Austin, TX. She is the author of Everyday Justice: The Global Impact of Our Daily Choices and The Hunger Games and the Gospel. Connect with Julie at julieclawson.com 




“Every definition of what it means to Love One Another will risk oversimplification: "To serve in a way that leads to friendship, but does not demand it." Love is serving others, even enemies, in a way that might make possible a friendship; not based on competition but unconditional admiration. Friendship is better than sacrifice. "Self-sacrifice" is not an end but a means to a eudaemonistic end of loving friendship. "

- ChrisHaw
Chris is the author of two books: Jesus for President (2008) and From Willow Creek to Sacred Heart (2013). He lives with his family near Notre Dame University, where he is doing his PhD in theology and peace studies. For the last ten years he worked as a carpenter and adjunct professor (and a bunch of other stuff) in Camden, NJ. Connect with Chris at chrishaw.com

 "I believe loving one another well means seeing them through the eyes of Christ. It is not approaching the relationship in a way of thinking "how can I serve you" or "what can I gain from our relationship" it is recognizing that each person is a Creation of the Almighty and is Holy and Dearly loved in His sight. It is in focusing on that aspect of a person that allows you to Love them as Christ does." 

- Erika Steele
Erika is Executive Director of Lighthouse Christian Ministries, a non-profit in Bacliff, TX.  She is blessed to be the wife of an amazing Christian man and the mom of two energetic, bouncing five year old twins. 

Amen

While having coffee with a friend of mine last week, he shared with me a personal experience that he had while running and what the word "Amen" really means. As the repetitive nature of running is often conducive to simple thought, he began to ask what place the word actually has in our prayer and communion with God. We utter the word almost instinctively in conclusion of a prayer or use it when discussing something that we approve of. But how many of us have ever stopped to meditate on what the word really means? This got me thinking and my thoughts came to fruition this morning while listening to a conversation in Starbucks.

Two young men were having a discussion revolving around the recent execution of Edgar Tamayo in Huntsville last week. From the details, words and phrases of their conversation, I could tell that they were Christians. And I quickly came to the conclusion that they not only approved of the execution, but seemed to be somewhat joyful that this man was dead. As the conversation began to wind down and it was clear that their discussion was about to change gears, one man declared with finality, "Well, he's finally dead and that's one more illegal alien scum bag that we don't have to worry about anymore."  His friends response? "Amen!"

Amen. Think about that for a moment.  

The word has a Hebrew origin and basically means "so be it". It has developed in Christianity to express strong agreement and confirmation of the context of the prayer. With the declaration of "Amen", one is expressing that all that has been prayed for, asked for or uttered with thanksgiving, is being agreed with in the assumption that God approves, agrees and accepts your words as being in union with His perfect will. One could make the argument that from our perspective, prayer in it's purest form is uttering the words of God, assuming that His words would be the exact words that we offer to Him.

"Well, he's finally dead and that's one more illegal alien scum bag that we don't have to worry about anymore." 

"Amen!" 

My goal is not to debate the moral grounds of the death penalty or defend my personal beliefs. The argument can be theologically and Biblically defended from both sides of the issue. There are strong opinions from both perspectives and if approached from love and humility, I respect both views. But as with most issues within Christianity, my concerns rise more from the heart that guides a person to reach a certain perspective, rather than the complexities of the issue itself.

The conversation that I overheard this morning really had nothing to do with support or opposition of the death penalty. Obviously, these two men supported the capital punishment and I respect their freedom to hold that belief. What I don't support is the apparent hatred of this man and the celebration of his death, rather than isolating their emotions to his actions. What I don't support is the "amen" that God would somehow celebrate an execution, preceded by a pattern of death by a man who God loved as much as He does you and I.

We live in a dark world and a culture that sometimes seems to be consumed by death. We witness evil and the results that come from evil actions. Unfortunately, we do not always have complete control of what our eyes see and what our hearts ingest. We process what we experience, filter the information and emotions and decide how we will outwardly react. We can choose to allow our pain to cause us to react with anger and hatred, thus perpetuating the cycle of pain for others. Or we can choose to shut down the cycle, healing what has been broken and loving when it's hard.  Our emotions can lie, but they can never keep us from externally expressing truth. What would that look like? How would our culture change?

Can I get an amen?





     

Love One Another - Part IV

Love One Another is a series of blogs that I began developing back in November. I took a break during Advent to focus my writing on the themes of the season in a series called Advent Reflections. In the beginning of this endeavor, I simply began asking various people to express what it personally meant to them to "love one another" (John 13:34) in 2-3 sentences. My intention was not to encourage deep theological dissertations or even much contemplative thought. I simply wanted to find out what people thought in a more off-the-cuff manner. I asked a wide and varied group of people from well known Christian leaders, authors and speakers to everyday folks that I know in my community. The response was so positive that what started out as a single blog entry has now become a series of blogs including one video post by The Whiskey Preacher, Phil Shepherd.  

As we journey through the landscape that is our lives, we run across more than our share of opportunities to love one another. Even to those that we have no communication with, simply by a smile or eye contact, we have the ability to reflect love. Love is much more than an action or decision to love. Love is an all-encompassing emotion that transcends how we feel, what we do or what circumstances surround us. When we reflect on what love really is, we see that it is an emotion that involves much more than any other emotion. In fact, one could even venture to say that love is more than a sentiment, but a supernatural occurrence that frees us from the restraints of human emotion.

As we begin the New Year, let us be reminded that when we love one another, we are not just expressing a simple human emotion to the world around us; we are expressing the very existence of God in this world and His unending love made evident through Christ.

Meet the contributors for Love One Another - Part IV:

"Jesus taught us to love our neighbors, which is no small thing. But the fragmentation of North American culture has made it difficult for most of us to even know our neighbors. "Love one another," it seems to me, is a call to be the sort of community where people can know one another. And that means sticking around, even with those people who bore you or annoy you or enrage you. This is not possible without forgiveness, which is why we cannot love one another without a strength that comes from beyond us."

- Jonathan Wilson-Hartgrove
Jonathan is Co-author of the celebrated Common Prayer: A Liturgy for Ordinary Radicals, and author of several books on Christian spirituality, including The Awakening of Hope, The Wisdom of Stability, and The New Monasticism. He is founder of Rutba House in Durham, North Carolina, where formerly homeless are welcomed into a community that eats, prays, and shares life together. Jonathan is also Director of The School of Conversion, a nonprofit organization that educates people in Christian community, and Associate Minister at the historically African American St. Johns Missionary Baptist Church.



“I always liked this Thomas Merton quote: “The beginning of love is the will to let those we love be perfectly themselves, the resolution not to twist them to fit our own image. If in loving them we do not love what they are, but only their potential likeness to ourselves, then we do not love them: we only love the reflection of ourselves we find in them”

- Michael Gienger
Michael is Director of Youth and Impact Ministries at The Watershed Church in League City, Texas  and an MDiv student at Perkins School of Theology. He is also the founder of EXIT39 , an intensive poverty simulation ministry, educating others to the plight of the poor and powerless in American culture.     

"I think Jesus said it best: "Treat people the same way you want them to treat you" Matthew 7:12, and "Do not judge, and you will not be judged" Luke 6:37. Even with people we dearly love, at times that's a real stretch, and with irritating or hostile people, it's practically impossible. Here's the key: "The things that are impossible with people are possible with God" Luke 18:27”

- Joy Wilson
Joy is a freelance writer and author of Uncensorded Prayer: The Spiritual Practice of Wrestling with God. You can get to know more about Joy at her personal blog: Solacetree.    

“To love means to listen; to sit down with a person and hear their story - not with a dispassionate demeanor and a subjective viewpoint; not with a pre-planned rebuttal nor an agenda - but to listen with your full presence and an unguarded heart. This allows for sometimes shocking and scandalous affection, which I believe is a part of our spiritual nature, to be nourished and grow. Once you know someone’s story - and by ‘know’ I mean that it touches your core beyond what your belief system thought possible - then judgments fade, walls crumble, and you begin to find yourself in love.” 

– Chad Estes
Chad is a former pastor who works with people to help share their redemptive stories through the art of photography and writing. You can find his blog at www.chadestes.com

and more of his work at revealmission.org

"Love is knowing someone cares about you even when you aren't doing the very best you can do. Love is the struggle to rise to the occasion in yourself...for others."

 – Gene Anderson 
Gene Anderson is a middle school STEM instructor, a sometime preacher, and an all the time djembefola. He is also an ordained pastor, has spent time in the US Army, cooked an awful lot of food in various restaurants, and once hitchhiked across the United States. He loves books and cheesecake, though not necessarily in that order."

 


 

Love One Another - Part III - Special Outlaw Theology Edition

"I think that before we can even remotely try to figure out what it means to love our neighbor, we have to first embrace the idea and the notion that we are to love ourselves."

My friend Phil Shepherd, The Whiskey Preacher, shares with us what it means to him to love one another in a special edition of Outlaw Theology. Thanks Phil, for not only contributing to the discussion, but for taking the time to speak directly to us.

Connect with Phil at philshepherd.com, Outlaw Theology and at his faith community, The Eucatastrophe. 

Grab a cup of coffee, check out Phil's vid. and join in the discussion....



How Do We Love Our Neighbor?

Love One Another - Part II

1 Corinthians 13:3 says, "And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love." I few years ago I led a chapel service for a group of teens at a local mental health and addiction treatment center. From what I had heard from other pastors, the amount of despair was overwhelming. I desperately wanted to give these kids something that would encourage them... not the typical empty motivational pep-talk. The night before chapel, I literally had nothing prepared and was extremely anxious and frustrated. I picked up a devotional book that I had beside my desk and opened it to the according day. I didn't even get to the devotion but was captured by the opening verse: And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love." In an almost audible voice from God, I hear Him say, "This is all they need to hear." That's all I needed to hear.

Without any written preparation, I faced this dejected group of young people with one of the most powerful truths that God has ever revealed to me. The exact words escape me, but I reminded them that if they could find a way to grasp hold of faith in a God that was real, cared about them and loved them, then that was enough to give them hope in a future that would be all that they wanted it to be. But above anything else, if they recognized that they were in this together, and learned to love one another, that would be enough to reveal God in their presence.  As I spoke, 1 John 4:8 came to mind and I explained that one of God's essential attributes is love. "If God is love, and He calls us to love one another, are we not revealing God to one another as we love one another? That is why the greatest of these is love, guys!  Love one another! Be God to one another!"  

This is just my perspective, but the purpose of this blog series was to see what others had to say. To connect with contributors, just click on each name.  

“It seems as if loving one another is an ingrained desire in us all. The problem in putting it into practice is that there is a competing selfishness in our nature that is very strong. The answer is closeness to Jesus. As we grow closer to him, it is more and more difficult to be selfish. It becomes easier to follow the instruction Jesus gave us "to love each other as he loved us". Love looks different in each situation. With each situation it may be different. He showed love to some with healing. He loved the 12 by walking patiently with them for 3 years. He loved the pharisees by rebuking them. Different each time. By asking the Holy Spirit, by asking Jesus.... By growing closer ......”

 - Jim Maas

Owner of Maas Nursery, Seabrook, Texas, business man, investor, composer, writer, artist, lover of nature and people, and friend and follower of Christ.

“Oddly, I think it begins with loving ourselves. Tragically, most of us love others like we love ourselves. The more we embrace who we are as individuals in God, the more we're capable of showcasing love toward other people.” 

- Matthew Paul Turner

Blogger, speaker, and author of 'Churched', 'Hear No Evil', and the forthcoming 'Our Great Big American God.

“Loving one another means putting others first. Philippians 2:3-4. When you think of others, think of them as a 10 and yourself a 1. Loving others is Death-Defining! .” 

- Ron Hindt
Senior and Founding Pastor of Calvary Chapel Houston.

“To love another means to be present with them. To love another means to accept them as they are no matter what. To love another means more than words can express, but when your heart yearns for their well being and their presence, you will know you are loving well.”

- Pat Green
 Pat is a cab driving Franciscan in the Chicago area and an ordained pastor in the Presbyterian Church of America. He is also lecturer, storyteller and public speaker with a monthly column In The Lockport Legend. Pat also founded a youth outreach called YASO (Young Adults Speak Out), a safe place to give voice to young adults and teens. He is currently developing new a ministry vision for people to use their wounds as tools to helping others, based on theologies of Dietrich Bonhoeffer and Henri Nouwen. "I'm happiest when with my daughter or driving my cab overnight. It's where love lives."

“To love one another means awareness of another's being and situation and making the space and compassion to accommodate such a person with dignity and care. The heart has the capacity to support and enrich in so many ways. Strengthening not only the recipient but the giver as well”

- Steve Rabeles

Owner and shaper at Rabeles Surf Boards. Spiritual healer from Galveston,Island Texas, currently living in Oceanside, California.

“For me loving one another is inspired by a recent reading of Miroslav Volf. Giving and forgiving love is the kind of love that most closely echoes God's love.” 

- Steven Ley

Disciple of Jesus, husband, father, lover of books, movies and football (the kind played with a round ball)